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I gave birth to my baby boy JULY 16, 2015. There is no one to compare yourself too. It is scary, it is hard, it can be down right disgusting and upsetting but it is real and normal. Da, samo za one koji u tome znaju uzivati. Three amazing kids and one super stretched belly! I do have chocolate, I do have coffee lots of coffee , and dinners are sometimes baked beans on toast. Zelim normalnu zaposlenu osobu. I am a mess of body fluid. I have 4 beautiful children and I cherish every moment from birth and beyond. I was broken just ha just! My wife remains the most beautiful woman I have ever met.
I am a mother. I am tired, broken and sore. I have lumps, bumps, marks and jiggly bits. I am a mother. I have created, grown, carried and birthed two gorgeous sons. I am a mother. I am solely responsible for the lives of two little humans, every single day and night, week in and week out and will be for the rest of my life and maybe future number 3 baby. I am a health professional. I work in an industry which is largely focused on the superficial. The how you look. Not how you feel. Not who you are. I am a mother. You too are a mother. You are also tired, exhausted, broken, sore, have lumps, bumps, marks and jiggly bits. You too live in a world which judges you on how you look. Not how you feel. Not who you really are and what you have sacrificed…and continue to sacrifice. You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. But this is such a small minority. For most of us, our bodies change, and change a lot. It is scary, it is hard, it can be down right disgusting and upsetting but it is real and normal. We are starting to see a shift in the media and online with more women sharing the often hidden and unspoken realities of child birth and the effect on your bodies. So I have joined in the movement. Here is my takebackpostpartum body blog. My real body after two children. On the 17th of January, 2015 at 11. I fought to conceive him. Put my body through assisted reproductive therapy. I was broken just ha just! Broken in ways I did not know my body could break see previous. Photographs do not tell the full story. I could barely walk. I was induced early just to get my son out as every day he was in me was another day I had to fight to keeping carrying him. Before I had children I would run marathons for fun…yes for fun — just wake up, find an event and run…I could barely walk to the letter box and I could not pick up my 2 year old. You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. It is often sort of lumpy and squishy too. I gave birth vaginally and it feels like a truck, not a watermelon, ripped through me. Good thing is I am so high on adrenaline and oxytocin nothing in the world matters except for my precious bundle…2 days later it is a different story. You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. Normally a size A cup, I am giving Kate Upton a run for her money. Show me that breastfeeding video one last time and I will tear the television from the wall socket — it is not helping. I am a mess of body fluid. I am wearing not one but two enormous maternity pads, inside granny panties to try and contain the postpartum bleeding. Golf ball sized blood clots keep coming out. I have to keep these to be inspected and make sure it is not part of the placenta. Where has my dignity gone? Sleep…I could count the hours on one hand but am just too beyond exhausted to remember. My body is experiencing a horrendous hormone withdrawal. Is this what drug addicts feel like? Maybe drugs would help right now…My eyes just keep leaking. I am more prepared for this second time around. First time, I just could not understand why I would not stop crying. You want to come and visit? You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. Still rocking my pjs. Still got a lumpy, squishy watermelon belly. Still got the granny style undies and thunder pads. I am glad to be home but surely it is illegal to be responsible for two other little humans when in fact you are a walking zombie? And what the HELL do I do with two children? I barely did 1 before??! How do I bath them both? How do I get them both feed at the same time? You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. Tummy still swollen, shrinking but swollen. I am still bleeding, its like the period that never ends. Am out of my pjs, rocking pregnancy clothes instead see you do get more than one use for those!! Boobs are like rocks. If he even thinks about going near those knockers he will get a swift slap. I will be honest I do feel better this time post birth than I did with my first son. Not fighting horrendous mastitis surely will be playing a large part of that. The other, is I am kinder to myself, I am not out trying to walk for an hour or more a day like I did first time around. I have basically told friends to come and visit in about 3 months time I am sorry but I know you understand. In case you are wondering — that lovely scar down my belly is from some major abdominal surgery I went through as a 21 year old. Was split open 6 times after an appendix operation went wrong. Two pregnancies has morphed and stretched this. May have to reconsider my dream job as a bikini model…. You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. Where did the last 8 weeks go? In a blur…a blur of feeding, sleeping, pumping, learning to juggle both children and work in among it all. Am exhausted, like bone aching exhausted. I am lucky to have the knowledge I do of good food to nourish from the inside, but I am still human. I do have chocolate, I do have coffee lots of coffee , and dinners are sometimes baked beans on toast. Sometimes I wonder why the hell did I want this so badly , but for the most part I love it, stupidly love it all. You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. Feel less zombie and more human. I am left with the marks of motherhood. I have just got my first period. I have irregular periods at the best of times so this I see as a true sign my body feels good. I now am ready to do some gentle activity, to help repair and recover. You may be broken, exhausted, sore, have lumps, bumps, marks and jiggly bits. Be kind to yourself and your body, you will look like how you are meant to when you feel good. It may take some time. It took me a lot longer to feel good following the birth of my first son then this time around. There is no one to compare yourself too. No one is walking in your shoes, deals with what you deal with. You will be judged. I am judged everyday and there will be people judging me right now. Doing what is right for you and your family takes courage, takes strength and as a mother, you have both. Nourish and love from the inside out and do not forget: You are beautiful, you are amazing, you are a mother. The emotional roller coaster I was on after giving birth. I had my 2nd child in December and am still trying to figure out how to cope. Does help that he has reflux, barely sleeps and just screams a lot which mean I resort to chocolate for me of course so my jiggly bits are getting worse rather than better. Kate Middleton must of had some industrial strength tummy control pants on coming out of hospital so quickly. I was in a wheelchair for 4 months of my pregnancy and it took a good 2 months before I was able to walk very far. I didnt bounce back as much as i thought and the struggle to the point where my tummy finally looked normal again, was really hard. Good on you for speaking and showing the truth! After my daughter was born, I remember feeling very vulnerable and emotional, but also so in awe of what my body achieved. It helps me recall just how much of a badass I am and suddenly I feel like I have got this! I desperately needed this!! I just had baby 2 two weeks ago and had to have s csection… I have been beating myself up over what I look like now… Giggly, wobbly, saggy!! Not like myself of years ago!! Thank you for being real!!! I remember after the birth of my first daughter the midwife looking down at my stomach and saying look at that nice flat tummy…in my naive and shocked state I later looked in the mirror to be greated by a wrinkled, deflated sagging balloon. I have lost weight over the years but sadly my fold of soft, scarred flesh will always remain.. Pregnancy broke my body too — it took me a year after my first to stop being in pelvic pain, and then I went and got pregnant again. By the time I gave birth a second time I struggled to walk 5 mins to Lidl, or up and down stairs. Yet 18 months later thanks to good physio, massages, and God I ran-walked my first and only marathon. Still adjusting and not feeling myself, not yet. My baby is 2 months young. However those things seem so out of reach right now. Family and friends tell me these moments will pass and that is my consolation. Oh and I miss my husband. Our marriage deserves nothing less. And as for my baby love she is worth all that I am going through and I would gladly do it again. As a matter of fact I am hoping to do this all over again very soon. Another baby would be a blessing. Let Gods will be done. Thank you for sharing your story. I am 40 and 4 months ago I gave birth to my 4th child, my eldest is 18. When I had my daughter 18 years ago I bounced back immediately, no one believed the baby was mine as I was so skinny and full of energy — oh how things are different now. Thank you for highlighting the realities of post part im and making many women realise they are normal. My second child was born 26 hours and 10 minutes before yours mine is a daughter , and I have a similar scar to yours on my belly from appendicitis and then a twisted bowel two years later ages 16 and 18. Thank you for sharing your story and helping people like me who are ironically the vast majority feel less alone. You are an inspiration to other mothers who no doubt, like many of us, feel under pressure to look gorgeous within a short space of time after giving birth. My daughters are 11 and 8 and I can honestly say that I have struggled to accept my body as it is now. But I can now say that my body is amazing because it gave me my girls and they are worth being scarred and squidgy for. My first was nine weeks early due to preeclampsia, and my second was born almost exactly one year later.. Almost 40 lbs of water gain each time on top of normal weight gain.. Now my second is 15 mos old, slowly starting to feel like my old self.. You are brave and wonderful for sharing your experiences and beautiful body Julie. I had my second the dy after u on jan 18th 2015 at 9. Been looking this week for diets where I can drop the bulc of my baby weight as a start as my body has really been getting me down and my husband said he will do it with me so I have support. You are what you are and your body is getting through things the best it can. I truly felt broken like you did. So important to tell mums to be or new mums : please no guilt about yours feelings or your body : we are ALL going to the kind of same way. I have crazy respect for you ladies who go through all this and then some. It is not easy, and I am not strong enough to handle ANY of this, and I just do not want to. I made a choice from a very young age — I do not want children. I love kids- my cousin has 3 beautiful kids under 9, and I love those 3 tykes to the moon and back. Their mum is amazing, and I began to understand what it all entailed when I started hanging out with her and the bubs. As did my own mum- quitting her job to raise us, and only went back to work when I was 12. She also did her law degree when I was 9. Crazy and unexpected and my dad has always been so supportive. My best friend is currently 8 months along with her first, and I felt the baby move in her tummy for the first time yesterday. I to am a runner. I think every now and then we do need reminded of what an amazing thing we have created and what our bodies have went through. As a man, whose wife had two babies now 23 and 21 I can tell you that it is very easy to forget that your partner can be having these feelings. Pregnancy often occurs at a time of maximum work stress. In my case I was looking for a permanent job in a different part of the country. Men need to remember to tell their partners that they are still as attractive as they have ever been. My wife remains the most beautiful woman I have ever met. We met in 1986 and she has matured to perfection over the last 30 years. Thank you so much for posting this. I can relate with you down to the T just missing that confidence though. It is just what I needed to hear today. I have had 4 babies, 2 IVF, 1 set of twins and have been struggling for 2 years to get into shape and feel good again. But you are right. I need to focus on all the good things I achieve every day, being a super woman, for my family. Good on you Julie. I just wanted to let you know that this post made me cry, and left me with an overwhelming sense of respect for you. Well done to you, you have every right to feel proud. We have fertility issues and I have endometriosis to top it all off. I struggle to talk about it with my friends and family but being able to read your experiences is really comforting and warm. And you are right in all aspects except one, if you want to run a marathon again you can. Juggling three in the bath, breastfeeding the baby while bottle feeding the toddler and hoping the preschooler was behaving. I can laugh now, back then a bit more zombie like. But although I never ran a marathon prior to having kids and jiggly bits I have since. Great to get some space and time on your own, why not have a goal. Great writing, keep it up and yes I still have the jiggly bits they never really go away but they are my tiger stripes, I am a mother! I had only 2 pregnancies, and always looked like huge ball, swollen like Kim Kardashian. I forgot how long did it take the first time to lose the belly, I was breastfeeding but it took me few months. I also experienced postnatal depression, the worst experience of my life. I was afraid the second time. I washed it, kept it in lemon juice for a day then cut into pieces, dried and encapsulated it. I am free of PND and I am so happy about it. I was mad at myself that for 5 months after birth I still had to worn pregnancy clothes, especially trousers. Reading your story and the comments that others have made, brought back a lot of memories, especially of the gigantic maternity pads lol. That everyone has bad days and to call on your friends and family to help, no one is a super mum! Now my children have grown up into young adults, one has flown the nest and the others would if they had enough money, the challenges are less but they will always need you and you will be the first person you call when they have news to share. Enjoy the ride because it will seem to fly by and then the next challenge will be learning how to live without them around all the time and how you sometimes wish they were babies again. I gave birth to my third baby on 4th Jan 2015, 11 months after having my second baby and have been struggling with the postpartum phase mentally this time. You have captured the aftermath of pregnancy and birth brilliantly, I love the part about painful uterine contractions after birth being like labour, made me giggle as exactly what I said to the midwife afterwards!! I have watched my girls all go through their pregnancies with their individual struggles, and survive the postpartum phases in differing ways, which at times has made my heart bleed for them. I hope that other girls who read your story can now relax and as much as possible, enjoy the ride, rather than get overwhelmed by expectations…real or implied…and perceptions that are not relevant in the least. It is hard work, and at times feels soul destroying , but there is absolutely nothing in this universe that equals the joy felt when your baby looks up at you with recognition in his eyes, and a huge toothless smile. Congratulations Julie, and to your husband, for creating such a perfect family. Your post is so honest and open. After giving birth to our precious daughter almost three weeks ago, the memories of those first few days post partum are still so fresh. Nothing can prepare you for the roller coaster that follows. Then all of a sudden in the middle of the night you look at the gorgeous bundle your are nursing and wonder how two people that love each other can create such a perfect little person. We are beautiful, we are amazing and we are mothers. To ALL the young mums in the world You are doing the HARDEST job ever and you can only do your best with what you have at the time!! Post partum is so hard as well, you describe it really well. I do have a tip that I learnt with baby number 4 and that is give up coffee if you are breast feeding — and very carefully watch all that you ingest as even one tiny orange or bit of onion will set them off, coffee stops bubba sleeping and also is very acidic for them to deal with, baby number 3 was very unsettled for me and in retrospect I think that was what did it as I was a total coffee lover and had to have my 2 cups no matter what. You are an amazing lady for sharing you story!!!! That was a refreshing emotional read, but something I absolutely needed to hear. Thank you for this article — it is helpful. And to do this, I suspect culture needs to change. Certainly not my intent. At any rate — thanks for posting this. I totally agree — all the research I have done in this area — both in terms of physical changes and exhaustion, the research studies strongly indicate that if women and yes men! How brave of you to share honest photos of what it looks like to be postpartum. I recently published a book you may find helpful, Baby Bod — Turn Flab to Fab in 12 Weeks Flat and I would love to send you a copy. It is a groundbreaking program that bridges the gap between medical care and fitness advice. I am a physical therapist passionate about helping women reclaim their bodies after childbirth. It is so encouraging to read the truth of one of the most wonderful things we are ever priviledged to do. But the best thing any of us will ever do. Hold onto the wobbly bits that will return in your 50s after you thought they had gone, the scars that tell OUR story. Congratulations to all you mums out there, you are doing brilliantly. Refreshing and empowering hearing real words from amazing mothers. By the way, you are gorgeous and I LOVE how you smile so genuinely despite the reality of the tough times that shine thru in your words! Now at 37weeks and going through the baby blues I am so glad you went into detail. I see my body changing and it feels like its for the worst. I quickly looked up your blog and found piece of mind reading through it again, but taking my time with each sentence and trying to absorb it in. Thankyou for posting this up. I understand a little bit more now that we are beautiful, we are amazing and that I am about to be a mother. I nearly did a little wee from laughing.. Anyhow I loved your honesty and frankness and mostly your sense of humour!! God knows we need that.. Women are entitled to voice that. Thanks for publishing your 1st hand knowledge and I hope it will relieve some of the pressure on new mums so that they can enjoy their babies! I am a mother of a 2. I love your frank and honest writing and pictures. After reading your blog it looks like baby 2 is different than the first and you view things slightly differently. I hope I can be as positive about my body second time around and can find time for a shower lol. I am a first time mum, my daughter is 8 months old and I still have not got back to my pre-baby body. It was so refreshing to read this blog. In saying that it is these changes we would also never trade because they all tell our very own story in all its Complexity and perfection. I have 4 beautiful children and I cherish every moment from birth and beyond. I mean, they were GONE. And yes, I am celebrating my pregnancy boobs while I have them! I have a truly wonderful husband who reminds me how much he loves me exactly as I am and loves my body in all states, and tells me how amazing it is that my body grew and nourished a child and is doing it again. Thank you for your honesty, humor, courage, and kind words, and your children are beautiful and look so very loved! I really thought taking the photo with baby in hand was great! You seem like a beautiful person with a beautiful family. I was enormous when pregnant, my belly button couldnt even pop because it was stretched to oblivion. I had no family support apart from my awesome husband and ended up suffering from depression. I wish I could have been as brave as you. If I could look anything like you just a couple of weeks after giving birth I would be over the moon! I admire Kate Middleton but I had to do a double take when reading a magazine article this week! I recently okay, 5 months ago gave birth to my 4th blessing. I love my children with all my heart. I have so much respect for what my body accomplished, but looking in the mirror is HARD. My stomach will never be bkini worthy again. My stretch marks and muscle separation are ugly. It looks like I have 2 belly buttons instead of one. Not everybody wants to deform their body but not all women know that it is a REALITY that will happen to them if they choose to become mothers. No wonder that there is so many postpartum depression… For motherhood to be a REAL choice it has to be with REAL information. And this one is only one of the many taboos that remain not told from motherhood… THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR SHARING!!!!! I gave birth to my baby boy JULY 16, 2015. Your words and photos were so refreshing to read and see. I am typically very active and always have been. I am amazed at how difficult it was to even walk the first two weeks! The road to recovery is apart of this journey and I have to rind myself of that. Of course al worth it. I can sit and stare at my little guy all day! And thank you for mentioning how difficult breast feeding was. I had no idea and have ended up pumping and feeding formula. Thanks again for being brave and sharing your story! Cheers here state side in Portland, Oregon, USA. Gracias a tus fotografías muchas mamás del mundo sentirán que no son bichos raros por no tener un cuerpo 10 tras el parto, como las mujeres que vemos a diario en las revistas y en la televisión. Pero estoy segura de que todas las madres del mundo te agradecen este gesto, tanto las normales como las que no lo son tanto y necesitan sufrir mucho para demostrar a todos lo estupendas que están. Julie, thank you very much for having the courage that many other moms lack. Thank you very much to show us these great pictures and to show all moms that this is the normal body of an ordinary mother after having a baby. Thanks to your photographs many moms of the world feel they are not weirdoes for not having a body 10 after childbirth as women we see every day in magazines and on television. But I am sure that all mothers in the world will appreciate this gesture, both normal and those that need to suffer a lot to show everyone how great they are. I am not as young as you are, I gave birth twice, 15 and 13 years ago, at resp 33 and 35. It is a fact, times passes and our body reflects our life events ; which life event is more magic, beautiful and gratifying than giving birth? I wish you and your family a long and peaceful life, Isabelle, Paris. I remember giving birth to my first baby 25years ago — I was horrified at the state it left my body in, I had a flabby, wobbly sack where my baby had once been! But I checked the rest of the ward — yep, we all pretty much looked the same, bruised and battered! The road to full recovery sometimes felt very slow and rocky but now 25 years on and at the ripe old 50 I look back at those years with some fondness. The human body is a remarkable thing. I had a really hard time after my pregnancy. In addition, I was in a bad relationship and I had post partum depression. I have never had much self esteem and was even less then. Almost 12 years later, I am the largest I have ever been and in another unhappy relationship. I have never accepted my post- baby body. Thank you for being so candid. My journey to love and accept myself starts today. A cutie with a little bump asked me when I was due to have my baby. That jiggly, marked tum eventually shrunk. Four more births, all VBAC, have done interesting things to my body. Back in the dark ages before pregnancy I had no shape whatsoever. Now I have breasts, that sag. Hips that mostly behave themselves. And my own very special ruched tum. I am a mother. I am a grandmother. I am still amazed at how little preparation there is for those first weeks and months after a baby comes. The mention of depression somehow suffices, but there is so much more that we all go through. I remember sitting on the couch with my tiny daughter screaming turned out she was hungry because it took eight weeks for us to make breastfeeding work , and not being able to move for fear of ripping stitches, and just being amazed that no one had ever talked to me about anything beyond counting contractions and walking and dancing through labor pains. Thank you not just for being real, but for sharing. This is an amazing piece of you and millions of women, including myself, of course! Thank you for your bravery! You are a wonderfull women. There is an unhealthy cult of the body in our society. Each must be thin, everyone should be glamorous. All crazy about it. When my boyfriend says about children, I come to the horror and think only about the opportunity that he will leave me when I will be larger in size after pregnancy. I look at the photos of you and your family, of your happiness, how smiling your husband, and I want to think you will be never afraid about the same fears as mine. I apologize for any errors in my text. Although my pregnancy was good, but the period after birth was strange for my body. Everything was different from what I thought: I got foot problems, could go badly, my belly was different than before, emerged everywhere sites on my body. But I have my son, a beautiful child who grew in me that with me — in my belly — went for a walk and smell the forest. Thank you Julie for your blog! All the best for your family! I had a baby girl in March and I was surprised to see that I still looked pregnant a week after giving birth and it took a while for my belly to go back to well, almost normal. Well, nope, I had no idea! Motherhood is tough, physically and emotionally but my daughter never fails to raise a smile. All the best to you and your beautiful family. As a first time mum the reality of having a baby is so different to the image I had when I was pregnant.. Jestem 4 tygodnie po porodzie i do powrotu wagi sprzed ciąży zostało mi do zrzucenia 8 kg. Jednak teraz się już o to nie martwię bo mam poczucie, że nie tylko ja jestem w takiej sytuacji. Przestałam porównywać się z wychudzonymi modelkami z bilboard-ów. Super, że na świecie są takie kobiety jak Ty! Dziękuję za podtrzymanie na duchu i wsparcie dla kobiet po porodzie! Trzymam za ciebie kciuki wyglądasz pięknie! After the move we had no choice but to move house as well and my own health took a back seat behind hospital appointments, starting nursery for boy no 1 and setting up the new home. But after reading your blog I have renewed hope. I am an amazing mother. They see a mummy who hugs then every moment she gets. I asked my husband after reading your blog if he still finds me attractive. He said I was the most beautiful woman in the world. I asked him about my scar and my stretch marks. If I could jump through this screen and hug you I would. You just care less about the trivial things, like the size of stomach, bled for only 5 days, out of hospital within 6 hours of birth and straight out for a visit. The big ones curly hair and pout especially???? Love it, thank you so much! You put so much of my thoughts and experience into words, I too had a vaginal delivery and felt like a truck went through me… Tough recovery, as my body does not just bounce back. And tough transition from one to two babes! Awesome work for being real and writing this as you went through it and sharing???????? I live in Hawaii and my belly never sees the sun. I see moms at the beach all the time, but their bellies do not look like mine! Thankfully, three kids keep me so busy that I hardly have time to angst over it. I tend to wear haramakis to hide my belly when lifting up my shirt to nurse the youngest. It works out well. My husband is most loving and kind to the belly, so that helps. My mom had two kids and her stomach looked normal enough to me growing up that I never expected mine to do weird things. My belly button sort of disappeared or something. Three amazing kids and one super stretched belly! I love fitness, working out, and athletics…. Thanks goodness I have discovered a wonderful program and physical therapist Sarah Duvall that has a absolute passion for women. Hope everyone continues to fight to feel good, strong, and healthy…NOT just to look how people expect. This post makes it a bit easier.
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